This week was a very long week for a few reasons. But it was amazing and humbling at the same time.It started out with Roberto. Remember him, the guy with the tough question?? Well, I should have trusted more in the Book of Mormon. He told us on Tuesday that he received an answer that it is true, and that it really doesn´t contradict the Bible. You just have to read or interpret the Bible differently. He is an amazing man having an amazing change. He told us that he almost left last week for Teguc to find work, but someone told him they could have a job for him here. He openly acknowledged with us that it was God, keeping him here a little longer. I am constantly amazed by his spirit and his understanding. I am sad, however, becuase I don´t know if I will be here to see him get baptized, but that is not something big. I just hope he decides that it really is what God needs him to do.
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Monday, June 3, 2013
We spent most of the week preparing branch business. We called a new Relief Society Presidency, and they are pumped to get working!!! We have to divide our time into branch and mission, but we are learning how. I have learned that some really humble people can do some really amazing things, and I have seen how the Lord really does qualify whom he calls. Its an amazing experience. It makes me think of an Ensign quote from Elder Andersen, when he says that worldly wisdom is always worth more when it bows down to the wisdom of the Lord. The mission counselor who is over us came this weekend, and was there for sacrament. He said that he is super pleased with how the branch is growing and how it is working. We finally have it looking somewhat like an LDS church should look. We cleaned all day saturday, and it looks ten times better!
And now, for the absolute craziness. I learned an incredibly sacred lesson this week, and even though it came through some circumstances that are tough to deal with, the Lord works in mysterious ways.
Friday night we got back late from doing divisions. I stayed with the other gringo here to teach seminary, and my comp was sick, so he went with the other latin to our house to sleep. We got done with seminary, picked up some food, and and started to help out my comp with daily reports, him being dl and all, and asleep, I just did it for him. Well, we got a phone call from a member and she told us that one of our other members was dying in that exact moment. It took a moment to register, but when it did, it was all hands on deck. I took off running with the gringo to the guys house. It was cold, raining really hard, and we didn´t care. I just made sure I had oil, and we took off.
We got to the members house, and asked where he was. I didn´t even say hi, I don´t think. They took us to his room. He was laying on his bed, glassed over eyes, and rolling side to side. I tried to talk to him to get his attention to ask him about the blessing, but got no response, so I asked the people around if he could hear or speak. I think I said it in Spanish, but they all looked at me funny, and so I repeated myself. They said no, so I looked at the other gringo, Elder Ward, held out the oil, and said anoint. He did. I took a moment to steady myself and pray for some guidance. I don´t remember the blessing I really gave, but I do remember that I mentioned in some parts, in essence, that he would soon pass on. I didn´t want to say it when it came to me, but I did. I mentioned some other stuff, and even though I knew he couldn´t hear me or understand me, it was added to me that our Father loves him. I felt the most intense feeling of a type of love in that moment, and the only way I could define it was a hurting love...Like a ¨why would you do this, don´t you know how much I love you?¨ sort of a thing.
I ended crying. I couldn´t help myself. I felt so overwhelmed by feelings that weren´t mine that I couldn´t help myself. When we got done, I stood for a moment and regained myself. I asked what had happened. His cousin told me that a few hours earlier, this member had drank a lot, gotten super drunk, and had tried to hang himself with a scarf. His sister in law found him, and they took him down. He wasn´t really breathing, but they called a doctor who gave him an injection to fight swelling to open up his trachea. He didn´t check, though, against the alcohol, and the injection had a reaction against it, putting him in a conscious comatose state.
I walked home crying. Asking myself and God if that was really what I was supposed to say. I honestly got home and was just destroyed. I honestly wondered why I would say that....or why I would be prompted to say that. I felt like I had, in a way, just condemned him to die. It was tearing me apart. After the other elders left our house, I just started reading from my scriptures. Just reading and praying. I was tired before, but I wasn´t anymore. And then I read DyC 18....the worth of souls is great in the eyes of God. It hit me that I had felt the love of our Father in Heaven, who was in pain to see his own son try and do this to himself, and that even though he had messed up and was struggling, our Father in Heaven still loved him with a love we cannot comprehend. He loves me and everyone else. I couldn´t fathom it. I understood a little bit more what his love really feels like, and this experience will be forever ingrained in my soul. I felt such a peace and comfort knowing that, and I could finally fall asleep.
God lives. He loves us, and I testify of that love.